New Year Resolutions and Such

I have always thought that people who make new year resolutions are cool. I mean, it is pretty great that you have things that you want to better about yourself, and that you set a goal to do them.

Me, I never make new year resolutions. Not quite sure why. I think it is because I just can't think that far ahead. My life has always been, "Okay, what project do you have next in school that you need to devote your entire life to? Alright, that is what you need to be working on."

Sad thing is, that always worked really well. If I was a new year resolution kind of person, I might be one of those people who actually follows up on their goals, and makes them happen. Too bad I am not that kind of person.

Today I was thinking about new year resolutions and I found that instead of picking things that I wanted to do to make myself better, I wished I was just someone different. Well, not someone different. But a different me. A cooler me. A me that is everything that I wish I was.

-A me that actually fulfilled my lifelong dream of writing something worth reading. Something of merit and interest, that had people all over the world waiting for the next installment. A book, perhaps, of something witty and fanciful.

-A me that was an innately talented chef, who cooked a lot in her youth, and now was able to make a vinaigrette on the fly, bake a loaf of artisan bread, or know what a pilaf was.

-A me that took artistic photographic shots of everything around her, like her shoes on a ice covered walkway, a Vegas sunset, or the spiderwebs that covered every doorway of my old silver cottage home.

-A me that painted. Or played the banjo. Or sang. Or wrote poetry.

-A me that was more aware of the needs of others, and knew what she could do to volunteer her time to help those less fortunate than her.

-A me that never ever decided to wear make-up, so that I never realized how much better I look with it on. I would never feel pressure to put mascara on to go to the store, because I would have no idea how much mascara would make my eyes pop, or how blush would make my skin look healthier. Life would be much easier, because I would always be able to rub my eyes when they itch, or splash my face with water whenever I desired.

-A me that was much more open about her personal life, because I realized how much I love hearing the intimate details of everyone else's lives. A me that talked, as well as listened, because I wasn't afraid of what others would think.

In the end, I think we just have to be happy with ourselves. New year resolutions are good, but liking who we have become, because we have been trying to become someone good as long as we have lived, is even better.

None of this actually makes sense. I will go now.